I see my mary-anne walkin' awa-y-y! Bow Nahw now new, ne ne ne ne ne, ne ne nehw, ne ne new new Nah dan ah bwawn-now, ba bwan'll buh dada bwiddly doo.
That was supposed to be me air guitaring the solo from More than A Feeling
I woke up this morning and was hoping we drank enough last night to have a unicorn drawn on my wrist. Good News: We did.
Nah, lets use your guy, my drug dealer is going all pineapple express on me
They're pole dancing on a handicap sign post.
Also. I plan to spend time with you at boomers, high, teaching ourselves how to pee standing up.
I call it a party but only because that sounds better than 8 people getting drunk around a pool.
What we have is to special to throw away over a woman who spreads her butt cheeks on a pool table for me...
And one night I got way too drunk and thought he said call me a polish name so I called him Konrad. Now he thinks I cheated on him with a Konrad.
That's my new pick up line call me a polish name
he said we should drink responsibly and we all just kinda sat there laughing at him
Yeah, last night in the parking lot was hot. I'm sure whoever has the surveillance tapes thinks so too.
I just gave him road head. He came in the Taco Bell drive thru which seems pretty typical for my life.
Why the fuck was I face down on the floor with you mounting me like a horse anyway? I'm so confused
But I thought it was so funny last night
You also thought you were a gypsy mermaid last night
1st date with cop went weird. He yelled at me & we had a horrible date. Walking to the car I tripped & started bleeding & then he made out with me. Is it wrong that I want to see him again?
THIS IS WHY YOU NEED THERAPY!
You some how ended up sleeping on one of the beams that run along the ceiling of your house
Randomize
