Ducking stuck downtown...all the fuxkig roads are blixkded
its like an ocean threw up right in your lap
it's a girl!!
That's great, I look forward to meeting her in 18 years
Foreign porn with subtitles is a little disappointing.
kinda considering buying a life alert for sophmore year
He's drunk and putting on a tie for the jimmy john's delivery guy
Just ran interference for her again. Sometimes i wonder how many times in my life i'll have to be a cock block at the clinic
I just had to blow my nose on a mcdonalds receipt in my car. Its time to stop doing coke.
Family bonfire. I just discovered my cousin drank an entire bottle of champagne at the age of 7. I just got showed up.
I think I need to donate blood to see if I have Hepatitis. Again.
I just woke up to three dick pics. Apparently in my blacked out state. I was asking for them as the new valentines day card.
They broke our car window and then wrote "great night" on the next
I've never said "lesbians" so many times in a short response answer
Its because she suspects I'm a frequent drug user, which I am, but I am going to make her feel like she is crazy for believing it.
The highlight of my week is I found some hetero porn I didn't completely hate. Branching out.
Randomize
