Yep Great. Apparently I didn't just say things once that night. Drink. Yell. Repeat.
U also mentioned u werent wearing any underwear hahahaha
So guy #2, the dancer, is programmed into my phone under the name H.uy. His number- 11 digits. I should have stopped drinking.
just found out there is no tactful way to ask your girlfriend to wax her stache. no matter what a google search would have you believe.
So i told my advisor i had to drop the class bc the prof said "supposably" and "irregardless" within the 1st 10 minutes of the 1st class; she agreed with me that dropping it was the best choice
im going to live freely with my legs opened and my heart closed
I smelled my fingers after she left and they smelt like sugar cookies. I want that one again.
After she came with my hands around her neck, she sat there for a minute and gave me the scuba diving sign for a-ok.
I can't even teach it... It's just natural slutyness.. My mom has it too
apparently i saved myself a memo last night titled "cake" and all it says is "i love it so much"
I think the multiple Sunday morning sirens outside my window are a plot by the cops to get back at me for the shit we pulled last night. Or I should move to a better area.
Not that you went to little darlings at 3am. But that you checked in on Facebook. C'mon bro. You're better than that.
Nothing like the It's a Small World ride at Disneyland to remind you to take your birth control. I took it on the boat yesterday
Not after That Night. No. I hate tequila. And it hates me. Very mutual hateship going on.
There arew tilmes ina man's life when christmaas. THerew are times in a man's lfie when drunk texts from a bathrom hyufgirto. So, you know, merry chriastmans.
Just witnessed some guy throw his fake eye at his dad's face. Actually, he whipped it at him.
Randomize
