You can spell. I can kill people with no remorse. We all have our skills.
My boss just told me $1,000 at a six hour event wouldn't be worth her time. She makes $70k a yr. and apparently never learned multiplication.
can't come out tonight. went to the bar again last night and the bartender hugged and thanked me so much for my "generosity." I'm intrigued but terrified to see my credit card bill.
just put cider in my bong. gotta love fall
I'm drinking Dom Perignon from the bottle with a straw just to piss of some french dude.
I fell asleep to the sounds of them banging in the next room. It was oddly soothing...
I thought i'd save money with No Heat November but the amount of whiskey i have to buy to stay warm is probably adding up to more than a heat bill.
Under no circumstances is it ok to do naked cartwheels in front of anyone. i don't care how much ecstasy you took
I'll be really easy to find... I'm the naked one rolling around in cats.
Someone touched my vagina when we were out last night. The fact that it was you is inconsequential and I am still counting it as a pull.
Seriously. Texted me 4 times and that didn't wake me up so he nicely called and left a voicemail saying he WOULD call me 8 times. So when he called back I answered.
Ok. I'm gonna smoke some weed and look at some elephants without you then.
I think I ejaculated my soul out.
Tonight I'm getting fucked up for America because Lord knows we need it.
Just walked out of the train bathroom after having sex and got a round of applause from the passengers. Definitely the best part of the trip.
Randomize
