your profile still reads that you like women...interesting? I think there is some photography and video that will show otherwise
so he expects you to be his vegas whore for the season. nice.
i keep myself tagged when other girls look bad/ugly so i look better
Beer is about to convince me to do something really stupid.
I woke up hungover and opened my laptop to find that i had googled alcoholism again
I need a good reason NOT to eat this entire jar of nutella right now
I only get commercials for vodka and Rogaine now. You're exactly right, Hulu. That's exactly right.
It wasn't a threesome, it was me making out with one while looking at the other one screaming "does this make you jealous?"
Meh. People are people bro. All of us are hairless psychotic apes. Happy 420.
Im going..... Drinking all day and hand jobs from 18yr old emo rich girls that are just trying to get back at mom and dad for being to protective...SOLD
Ugh I need to clean my floors/walls/ I actually don't understand why boys get drunk and pee on things
Next time one of us has a party everybody has to wear a diaper. But actually you just need a shit ton of disinfectant wipes and maybe a hazmat suit.
I woke up this morning with 3 phone numbers, a red Chinese New Year envelope with cash in it, and a winning scratcher all stuffed in my bra. I'd say it was a pretty successful Thursday night.
I thought I'd never say this, but if I had to choose between these cookies and sex, it would be these cookies
Bitch got stabbed in the eye. With a fork. Wait for it... At church. I was the only one at a party interested in her story. Only in the south
That has got to be a joke. No human eats that much grass and lives to tell the tale.
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