so my mom told me to suck on something if I have to cough. so I guess blow jobs are ok
i wish i could, but i promised myself i wouldn't sleep with anyone who couldn't grow a beard for a while. it's not you, it's crosby.
At what point in time did you think it was ok to jizz in my hair while I slept??
Around the time you told me my brothers dick was bigger.
my life is about to be the like the hunger games except with penises. and im going to win.
I WILL NOURISH YOU WITH SOUP AND PENIS!!!!!! And a sandwich of your choosing.......you like turkey?
So I found where you barfed in my house. Just wanted to let you know that my cat barfed on the kitchen floor in a show of solidarity
if i can hear my landlord's phone ring you think be can hear my vibrator?
I'm tryin a pb and onion sandwich now
Please smoke with me until I agree that sounds like a good idea
I just sent Brandon a snapchat where I wasn't wearing a shirt but had a rooster drawn on my boobs that said "cock block" and laughed for 10 minutes I have problems don't judge me
I just wish my penis was a person so I could give him a high five.
He had an extremely smooth butt for a man with such rough hands.
Her blow jobs are legen wait for it seriously like 9 people I know brag about them dary
she chased shots of jack with a fucking steak. i'm in love.
Oh god, I forgot we had sex to Elton John
Her hot older sister walked in on us, looked me up and down, then stared straight at her and said "I call sloppy seconds on this one" then left. I'm still debating on how I feel about that.
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