This is clearly one of those "A hole's a hole" situations
I only kidnapped one of them. chill
Just caught my bro jerking off to a lane Bryant catalog
As im putting my laundry in the machine, i find a solo cup and a pong ball that i signed babe ruth
The bouncers kicked us out around 3 so we went to the grocery store flasks in hand and asked them to turn up their music...
Also, we accidentally donated a bong to goodwill
I can't remember much from that party after we snapchatted my dancing boobs to all of her contacts
I'll be there with bells on. And by "bells" I mean "jäger bombs". And by "on" I mean "being poured down my gullet".
I have feelings that need drinking.
How is it possible that I'm still a virgin and you've managed to have sex in a cheetah print onesie TWICE
I just went to add a song I had never heard before to my "high as fuck" playlist and it was already there.
I've spent my afternoon dipping strawberries in DayQuil if that's any indication of where I'm at in life.
There's a fine line between kinky and serial killer
Grrr. Fine. You get oral for being unwrong.
Heels with jeans turned Casual Friday into Casual Sex With My Boss Friday
Randomize
