now i know why they say having sex with her is the equivalent to licking a pay phone
His dick was so small it sat perched on top of his balls like it was king of his scrotum.
We were busted for public indecency in the back of my car in the parking lot. This time we were just reading my Cosmo magazine.
Using Dr. Seuss quotes to ask me how badly I want your penis is not appropriate.
just got invited to smoke a bowl by a guy who has a prostetic leg and has been on the jerry springer show multiple times. I love my life right now
So, we're going at it on the sink when a German kid walks in and starts brushing his teeth. I love hostel sex.
He has a landing strip. I repeat he has shaven himself a landing strip. HELPPPP!
This is the 4th time we've hooked up, and this morning we woke up, he got out of bed and left. Left me alone in his apartment with 3 of his friends. Without even a word. Why do i like this guy?
Umm... How do I tell my roommate someone shot a speargun through the wall? On a side note, cliff shot a speargun for the first time.
Welcome to drink and talk like a Russian afternoon.
Pirate drinking day will be planned for shortly
I approve this so hard.
I'm just chillin on the bathroom floor
Haha oh no
The bathroom floor is like my second bedroom on the weekends
Oh god I want to come home! They have an air raid siren here that alerts their neighbours across the desert it's time to come over on atvs and drink.
Apparently fireball doesn't mix well with my no carb diet
My life hurts
I woke up 30 minutes away from the bar, my car was at a train station, and when I got home all I got was the speechless head shake
It’s a hundred kinds of wrong to do Jell-O shots at home alone. Right?
I support drinking alone. But Jell-O shots. That’s a game changer.
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