A hot woman with candy. This is what heaven is filled with
Con: they had to cauterize my wound twice. Pro: The docs agreed I'll be able to get really drunk tonight since I've lost so much blood.
sound pretty economical
I feel like we're taking advantage of the fact that our R.A has cerebal palsey.
From the prices on this menu it looks like I have no choice. I have to blow him.
the cops who came hadnt heard yet. when we told them they sang the star spangled banner with us
Oh yea... In other news I've decided to get an external hard drive and start getting music from all the guys I'm fucking... Do you think a terabyte would be enough storage space?
I saw your relationship status and wanted to write "Now you can fuck with some peace of mind that she isn't giving that other guy she met online a handjob."
Also, I want you to know, that not only am I apparently the expert on sexting. Our bishop is consulting me later. So my talents are varied.
I got so drunk at the hockey game I bought everyone behind me in concession line a funnel cake.
If it's any consolation, I made really strong brownies yesterday and had 3 and then I saw demons
WHO TURNS DOWNA FRESHLY WAXED VAGINA IN A MAIDS COSTUME LITERALLY LAYING IN YOUR BED
We banged in my car doggy style with my head out the window. The sky was marvelous and I saw a shooting star. Its destiny; we're meant to fuck forever.
Why exactly is there a butt plug on the counter?
I guess it's part of life. Sometimes your ex boyfriend becomes a drag queen.
He stopped mid sex to say he was sorry that he couldn't make us work.continued. Stopped again to ask if it was crazy that he loved me.
That is not what no strings attached sex is about.
Randomize
