Dude, my boy c***** and I hooked up with Asian sisters last night in the same room
Then I put on blue by Eiffel 65 and security showed up and yelled at us for being too loud. Also, they stopped fucking because no one can fuck to eiffel 65
so I just used the H1N1 mask my mom gave me for college to hold in a bong hit longer... god I love orientation week
i just got a fart via voicenote. blackberry has officially changed history.
he asked me out through an event invitation on facebook, the title read Romantic Dinner For 2
Is it bad that I was more upset about not getting the perfume he told me he had bought for me then the actual breakup?
It's 10am. I'm hungover wearing a flyers jersey and a phillies hat and eating a cheesesteak. I'm not the only one. Best city ever.
Best idea ever: Giving hobos a beer and having a chugging contest to win another beer. Most fun I have had downtown in a while.
So after I pop out this baby we need to just go on a monthlong coke binge so I can get skinny again before vegas
Quick question, how many times can you get chlamydia before your vagina just gives up and falls off?
you want your laptop back?
are you giving me my laptop back, or cashing in on our break up sex?
both.
come over.
Yeah dude, it's amazing. Be careful though, that shit is really really intense. Like it's way more intense than normal shit...
I took two and feel like crushed diamonds spread over glazing marmalade
Just had sex in the room next to my parents. Heading back to school ASAP.
I look excited, but its just a facade.
For a second I thought he was going to give me an intervention
You can't give interventions in a bar!
Fruitcakes are only good for throwing at neo Nazis.
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