I skipped work to stalk him.
Fuck him tonight for the both of us. We're still tag-teaming in spirit.
I met the perfect girl for you, she's smart, likes cars, has at least one ear, and really blue eyes!
please elaborate on, "atleast one ear"
obviously he has no clue about college dating. it goes drunken sex then the 1st date
Hes warming up week old McDonalds french fries, putting hot sauce on them, and counting them with his shirt off.
Is it a step in the wrong direction to ask my parents for a kegerator for graduation?
You told me you loved me after I brushed your teeth with my index finger.
I IMAGINED YOU YELLING SURPRISE WITH JAZZ HANDS. AND I LOVE YOU FOREVER
You have to summon your inner elephant
I'm pretty sure I just need an IV drip of Plan B at this point...
I plan to get very, very drunk when I get off work.
But doesn't your shift end at like noon?
I don't think you understand.
Is it bad that I tried to build an outfit based around "What do people who use condoms look like when they buy condoms?"
You know you hit Mardi Grad bottom when you come to in someone's kitchen on the floor and you are eating gumbo out of a Mixing bowl with a ladle......yeah rock fucking bottom
Fun. You missed it. Michael broke a door with his erection.
He ate me out for my sailor moon manga and I gave him a blowjob for his Devilman manga. Pretty sweet deal imo
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