But you know it's love when you find brass knuckles in the same box he keeps his Naruto action figures.
If I squint, he looks like Jude Law. But that's kind of a weird face to make during sex.
Some are given great drunkenness. Others have great drunkenness thrust upon them, in the form of ice storms.
The gym is handing out free condoms this week, motivation to work out this week?
I think they were cool with it, they should have know if I was the host of the baby shower it was going to involve a keg and jager shots.
fun fact of the day: the man setting up my checking account at my bank has thrown up on my front lawn.
Oh eartly, In cocy youtu youchv make the wallflowers d tskunks!y, couch protection now,.sryou should feel special !
I'll be listening to "I will always love you" and sobbing uncontrollably all night, care to join?
Yeah. You can ask him out. We're just fuck buddies. My vagina will be sad but your heart can be happy.
bro i dont care how hot she was, you try keeping it up with the amount of puppet he had in her room, it was like fucking in jeff dunham's house
in a last ditch attempt to make life awkward after i die today i want to be buried naked and have an open casket funeral.
It got quiet and we all stood around and opened the box and I've never seen so many burritos in my life man. it was fucking biblical.
I was on etsy and I'm like those boobs look way too familiar
His girlfriend left him for the pizza guy. I am not fucking kidding.
He walked upstairs in nothing but his boxers and drunkenly asked my brother for a condom....so much for a good first impression.
Randomize
