There was a lot of him and a little penis
jungle juice + heels + stairs = broken arm
using the left over highlighters from the blacklight party to study for finals. feeling the need to write insert penis here on my econ notes.
two fat guys on crotch rockets just invited me to 'party' with them at a del taco. why does this keep happening to me?
Just charged fat mistake $3 for a beer.
I think I just sold a snake to a stoned teenager.
It's embarrassing enough people in my life are aware of the ridiculous things that happen to me. I don't think we need to get the whole world involved.
its like i had a thought but i dont know what the words are for it
Only I could host a baby shower where the cops get called.
So again no comment on the cleavage. I'm a bit disappointed. If those girls come together to make cleavage AND I send you a pic of it, you have to comment on it. That's like relationship 101.
Help everyone's hot
Men are hot women are hot non-binary people are hot aliens are hot
A surplus of mistakes were made and I don't know what 89% of them were.
Have you ever got so drunk that you tasted the future?
i gave head in a cab last night. get on my level.
I was looking at your nipple and it made me think of you
Well I hope so...
Randomize
