I see my mary-anne walkin' awa-y-y! Bow Nahw now new, ne ne ne ne ne, ne ne nehw, ne ne new new Nah dan ah bwawn-now, ba bwan'll buh dada bwiddly doo.
That was supposed to be me air guitaring the solo from More than A Feeling
Sign #1 this conference will suck: Ice breaker question, how many proud virgins do we have in the room, overwhelming response. Looks like I'm not getting laid this weekend.
then she woke up from sleeping for an hour and the first thing she said was "i regret it already"
Besides, I'm not in my 30's. I'm still allowed to drink wine from a bag.
This flask doesn't match my outfit. I hope the gays don't mind.
For the record, saying you're friends with the owner doesn't work when the owner is the one throwing you out.
Found a Safeway Deli Sandwich in the shower this morning... Perhaps the 9th beer was unnecessary.
Of course I understand. Thou shalt never turn down a free meal or drink. It's one of the commandments of being a girl.
Hold on - sidebar. My best friend just threw a 40 pack of condoms through my window.
It's Friday the 13th and you just got boned by a guy named Jason....
You were carrying a 6 ft lamp that we stole on your back yelling "OHANA MEANS FAMILY AND FAMILY MEANS NOBODY GETS LEFT BEHIND"
I seriously doubt this is the first time pumpkin pie has led to a booty call.
You literally just told me you're ditching me because of pizza. PIZZA? Wow.
Just paid for birth control in all ones do you think she is judging me?
shit i just threw up on a freshman
i don't know if i should laugh or feel bad..
nevermind it was a sophmore, laugh.
Randomize
