Do you ever creep on the girls you have banged and wondered how their walk of shame went?
Should I shave my pubes in the shape of a top hat so I can nickname my junk Abe Lincoln?
She fell onto my light and broke all four plants. I don't care how good the blowjob was.
The last thing I remember is him grabbing my ass and telling me he knew where the jello shots were, so I followed him.
can we get together and have a vodka water gun fight? i need to get som intense excersise/alcohol
We're stoned and watching little Einstein videos. Come. Over. Now.
Look bro I'll go half per boob with you, we split her.
We started pregaming at 8. It's 11, and her only 11:11 wish is to be sober. It's hard to not love her.
The guy I brought home last night made a speedy escape while I was in the bathroom. The only trace I found of his flight was a lone sock on the stairs.... It was like a whorey low budget Cinderella
I need to thank someone for this kid's penis.
I used your vibrator when you were out of town. Now I know why you always come out of your room smiling.
So this morning everyone commended me for puking over the porch. No one else made it that far...
I had sex in the bed of a guy who owns a house last night so I feel like this is a significant step up from car sex in the parking lot of a library
I currently hiding in an upside down garbage can please come find me
I had to explain to the doctor why I'm peeing blood. He still didn't believe a girl would have that much sex... You could feel the judgement forming in the room when I went into the details...
Damn, well a girls gotta get laid too
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