I was eating her out when she coughed, I just swallowed a bright red blood clot
It starts with an S and ends with arah just gave me a bj.
just saw someone in just a bathrobe not even tied shut run to the bathroom with a facefull of cum. Someone had a good night
Half the people who compete die. All the rest either lose their minds or grow an innate fear of sharks, vodka, and fishbowls
Side note... I would pay good money to have witnessed the reaction of onlookers as I sprinted down Armtiage with a 15 lb bag of peanuts under my arm
Except if I'm having sex. In which case you're in the bed with us or out of the room. No halfsie participation.
Operation: pick up a lawyer was a resounding success. Commence operation: football mugshot weekend
He tried to puke in the 14th hole and when I told him to stop he started chanting "hole in one hole in one"
I could teach a class on "expressing your thanks through photos taken of yourself in the shower"
is it too soon to tell him I'm available anytime for Christmas themed pity sex and I'll even wear a Santa hat?
I just saw a kid on iowa campus story that looked like the guy i made out with on spring break.
Realizing life ain't all about burritos and strippers, it's a struggle out there, and it ain't looking pretty so far,..
Hey can you send me a pic of your breast with a peace sign in the photo? I'm trying to win a scavenger hunt contest. Thanks so much
So after the absinthe shots_____(fill in the blank area for me please)......
Unless your name is actually "Ticfj" like my phone says, I have no idea who you are...
Randomize
