Dude that chick in the corner just threw up
Hot
also i tucked his toothbrush in my shirt. why? i dont know.
It's a Westpoint/Army thing, we talk about Miley Cyrus a lot
Why?
Because when is jailbait ever not funny? Answer: Never
I'm gonna stay in bed all day and watch porn in an attempt to stay warm.
I'd invite him but there's too many people who have fucked me going already
Home remedy for the herp. Black tea. I need to strap teabags to my wang.
two fat guys on crotch rockets just invited me to 'party' with them at a del taco. why does this keep happening to me?
He just said he was the Jesus of alcoholics.
I filled this oven with as much Pizza as I could, and I've been eating out of it for three days.
Just ate the last piece. Refilling the oven.
Was it fun? The night started with home made Jager and ended in him falling out of a tree with a pocket full of house numbers...you tell me.
I'm not going to say what I did. You're smart enough to figure it out. But I did it. And you owe me 20$
I need ecstasy. And, before you ask, the answer is yes right now
I woke up not knowing what state I was in. Turns out, people from Deleware are pretty helpful.
Like I'll lick your nuts to make you feel better if you don't get it
He ate me out in a golf cart while I watched the sunset. You are so right, golf skirts do provide amazing access.
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