You know you had good weekend wheb we you hook up with three different girls and you don't feel no pain when u pee in the morning
i know. thats why i need an open bar. i'll get hammered and make a toast about how his dick is like the titanic. large, but full of failure.
I got to the point where it seemed like she had 8 giant breasts instead of just two
I'm in Burlington Coat Factory. This place'd be great if you were on E. There're so many textures...
I'm kinda hoping that if I rub the right object, a genie will come out
I will not be held responsible for my vagina's poor judgment.
Just saw an all male dolphin threesome from underwater viewing
Why am I getting texts saying are you ready for this butthole? Help
It was awk he was sittin on a plastic backyard chair in his underwear and high white socks in the dark watching the nuggets game
It's like my life is one of those movies where after a bunch of outlandish events that only happen in a movie the girl realizes her true life calling and lives a great life with a sexy man of multiple races. But I'm stuck in the fucked up part where 25 year olds come in their pants.
There's a ton of international students in my suite and I'm just sitting in this chair with no pants on eating frosted flakes
We peed together in a dark alley while holding hands. That is a bond that can never be broken.
of course the one day I come to class high we have guest speakers from the police department... Just my luck
Broke my ankle and blacked out on my scooter last night. 'Twas grand.
she's throwing knives it scares me
update: broke ceiling. glass everywhere
I just want you to know that i deffinately saw the baby clothes, and didn't freak out and still had sex with him. I'm going to hell.
Randomize
