But i just feel like he will pull it out and ill panic. I mean its fairly basic. Up and down. But i feel like ill just freak out.
Does my status still say I suck cocks? I don't know how to change it
he said no sex till date three. i said the party was one, mcdonalds two and that i would take him with me to buy cigs for date three.
He painted his chest for the game... I just fucked an exclamation point.
I told him the truth. Truth leads to vodka. Vodka leads to tequila. Tequila leads to prison.
hes either a crazy bad problem or a crazy good orgasm. I just can't decide which one.
No no don't get confused. We do chemistry homework on Thursdays. We screw on Fridays. Other than that, Words With Friends is our only communication five days a week. We are NOT dating.
you closed your eyes and pointed to a cupboard..there was vodka on the top shelf. your sixth sense is amazing. plus, we convinced the foreign kid you're a booze whisperer
My apartment smells like a lavender field inside of a giant bong.
I just remembered that i did pull ups in a bikini on the porch of Red Lobster last night. someone needs to stage an intervention
omg his dad is hot
... I'm currently away at the moment. Leave a msg since I cannot express how much I can't help you stop ruining peoples lives.
IM GOING TO SIT ON YOUR FACE AND CHANT 'I BELIEVE THAT WE WILL WIN'
Right now I'm drinking out of a gallon water jug & eating a baconator. If you're feeling down, just remember you could be me.
Why the fuck was I face down on the floor with you mounting me like a horse anyway? I'm so confused
my mom is drunk and is trying to get me to take a picture of her ass. what is life?
Randomize
