Why can't I find a man that likes bush instead of a vagina that looks like it belongs to a prepubescent child!
Because men are children
Touche
They say you shouldnt they say its no good for the environment in your vagina
Tonight, I'm planning on being a bigger trainwreck than Britney Spears circa 2007.
you spent the like half the night trying to figure out the puzzles on the back of the captn crunch box
my ex gf has sooo many hot friends... i feel like im at a grocery store when on her fb... just shopping around.
At chipotle, there's a bachelorette party starting out the night here, i'm going to let you imagine what the bride to be looks like
It's either jizz or frosting, and either way, someone's being held accountable.
She has a boyfriend. But if he's a decent human being he understands blowjobs don't count as cheating with her. Keeping those miracles to himself is a crime against humanity.
I came in and she was laying on the ground just stoking it saying "the floor is where our feet step"
But I mean, have you ever just LOOKED at how majestic penises are? They are like ivory columns of pure wonder!
Watching the Walking Dead, snuggled up naked, and drinking a beer. No better way.
If ever there was a tweet to describe your life, it's this.
I've been rehabbing my soul with cheese and wine lately
He still want's to kick my ass for fucking his sister, probably a bad idea to leave the bar with his ex...
I dont pretend to understand how the heterosexual mind works. Its a mysterious cavern of stupidity and disgusting sexual acts.
last night someone said that theyd like to do drugs with a dolphin ... judging from the diagram on the wall we figured it out.
all we need now is a dolphin ... and some drugs.
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