i think i would be perfectly content if, on my deathbed, i could look back on a life that didn't have any fisting in it
Where you at
assisting at a photo shoot in williamsburg till 7ish. wassup?
Doesn't matter. I already jerked off in your bed.
Its 6am. Um if my mom for some reasons asks, you stopped by my house around ten and had some wine with me. She is concerned I drank a whole bottle by myself. Woke me at 6am to interrogate..Thank god my pounding head thinks fast.
PS We had chips too. She is less concerned about the whereabouts of the chips but still a good lie always needs detail.
(917) i just came from walking.
haha you just came from walking?
I just was on a 20min team conference call where I didn't speak, I used a Gus Johnson soundboard online to answer questions asked to me...the highlight of 2010
...that's why he's not doing anything with his life except breeding geckos
Just got a blowie during the Avengers. It's weird knowing that the high point of your life just happened.
I will blow you tomorrow if you bring me food tonight. Like a payment plan
He's claiming he can open a beer bottle with anything. He's been trying for a while now with a power rangers action figure and he is just cutting the hell out of his hand. There is blood all over billy
I kept resisting the urge to yell "2 for 2!" so they could hear me on the other side of the wall.
Red flag bro. Her only friends are barflys and a teen with a fake ID
Moral of the story: I had sex to Back to the Future last night.
Tell me why I woke up outside of our hotel room Wearing a cowboy hat and boots in Las Vegas.
Casey, if you want the continuing love of our mother, you're gonna need to stop drunk texting her from PCB.
He’s definitely circumcised. There’s not enough room in those speedos for a foreskin with that fire hose he’s packing.
Randomize
