I told u I don't really remember everything lol i pretty much remember not lasting as long as I norm and that I wore a condom, I hate condoms
yeah worst sex in my life. plus i think her little brother was in the room.
ya ever know whats down there. always send some fingers in first to scout the situation. fingers are not used for pleasure. they're used for covert missions.
Found a bar with a washer and dryer and they serve food. I never have to leave
So, do you know where my left shoe is? I mean, we were at a few places last night, and I called them. No luck for me.
I just discovered cum stains from two different guys on my wall. I don't know whether to be proud or horrified.
We ended up on a hotel balcony in Daytona where she lured a seagull down with a pizza crust she found in her purse and preceded to grab it out of the air by it's neck.
it's been a while because I don't count the hooker
Hes still mad that I left the room mid-hookup to go get a pickle from the fridge.
Some guy just bought a handle of cuervo, a curling iron, and a power drill. Paid with a jar of change. I'm torn between avoiding him and befriending him..
Was the guy in the cowboy hat kinda hot or have I just not had sex in a really long time?
I'm all about clean living these days
You started your day with fried chicken and a bloody
... after you woke up in your own urine
im looking at the positives. number one it stopped me from hooking up with vince infront of his girl, number two it gave me something to do instead of throwing up and number three i fuckin rocked his world
I just want this to serve as a reminder in the morning that the topic of conversation at last call was the penis size of jesus.
He was eating me out on a picnic table on the frame lake trail and right after I came, a group of hikers walked around the corner. Stood up just in time
And this is one of the many reasons why you need a car.
Randomize
