so now she's a stripper
can't say i'm surprised
i really wish facebook had an app for when you are looking at a chick's photo album, you could just skip to the ones where she and/or her friends are dressed like skanks
I hate this i feel like im wasting my youth here. I should be off hooking up with boys around the world and having awkward next morning convos in different languages!!
Living right is spending a lot of time in someone's ass
she laid there and continued moaning loudly for like 10 minutes after we were done, just so that her mom would be jealous
We're not in high school anymore. I'm not going to pretend to be impressed as he butchers my favorite songs on his guitar. I just wanted to get laid.
Just thought you should know, Im with josh now. Im no longer available for rent. I have a full time tenant now. Like, a year long lease at least.
Well I can't message him and be like "hey I was behind you in CVS a month ago and I remembered your last name and DOB and looked you up on fb and added you so wanna hang out"
Then my perve supervisor asked about your vagina. And I was like nunya, but its glorious
just shotgunning some tallboys in the cooler, you?
HOW DO YOU GET RAISES EVERY TWO WEEKS?!
So shaving my butt whilst humming "be prepared" is now in my top five weirdest Friday night activities.
He fucked me in his tour van, I feel like an official groupie.... Except I don't even listen to his band.
Tom just texted me he's Tindering from his hospital bed while they're running heart tests on him.
That's dedication to the game.
maybe i should limp back to therapy...
oh yeah will you also bring home vodka i wanna do shots on the roof
Ah you cut my boxers off with scissors, we're way past introductions
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