Lonely and bored. Am I allowed to play Dance Dance Revolution by myself?
either she doesn't know how to dress properly on a sunday morning stroll, or I just saw a 60 year old on a walk of shame
going to class with no bra.. is that saying "i don't give a fuck i'm one hour away from thanksgiving break?"
He snuck into my grandmothers house, broke her lamp, fucked me, then had breakfast with us the next morning. I am an awful granddaughter.
I was just wished a Happy Valentine's Day by the (Mexican) Chinese food delivery guy. I've never had clearer "get your life together" message than that.
definitely fulfilled the lesbian status quo and fucked her in the back seat of my prius
I think I will be cutting those pills in half...Jesus just tried to sell me a toothbrush.
Just because you graduated a semester early, doesn't mean you can take a semester off of drinking. Sorry.
Somehow it went from suicide to pierced nipples. I think we're good.
My therapist keeps stopping to ask what 'hooking up' means
ITS ORAL SEX CAROL
Just go to your happy place. Mine is with Jake Gyllenhaal & schnapps
ALMOST WRECKED MY SCOOTER. DAVE FRANCO HAS A TWIN AMD HE GOES HERE
I just want him to get into an accident where he's horribly disfigured but otherwise fine so he's not so freaking handsome
I just wish he would stop trying to bring his emotional baggage into our sexual relationship.
I fought off a bull with my bare hands while he went off to have sex with her against a wall. I’m more upset about the fact that no one is acknowledging what I did.
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