Already tried, she's too smart for that. I need a Primos "Do your wife in the butt" lure/call to trick her into wanting it
apparently the dude across the street has been dead for like a month. now I feel bad about pissing on his lawn
i dont know if you remember blowing your vomity nose directly into my hand...yeah thanks for that
I've hooked up with 3 different guys already this week...don't tell me I haven't been a productive member of society
I answered the door to some Jehovah Witnesses hungover and wearing nothing but a white tshirt. I think they made it the church goal to reform me, we've gotten four pamphlets. My mom's going to make me convert if they keep coming.
I've thrown up twice at work. Just casually, in the mop sink. Then continued to make someone a milkshake. Want some ice cream?
Also what is the name of Americas thing where we had a holy obligation to expand westward? I'm going name my new lighter that.
Currently hiding in the shower from the RA and my elbow turns it on. Showers and Ciroc don't mix..
Is it festive if I masturbate to Santa porn?
Let me rub your butt and eat French fries from your mouth and dip them in your ketchup filled belly button.
I haven't seen her in probably 3 months and when she showed up wasted to my house she promptly pulled out her tit
do you think your dog feels awkward being in the background of your nudes?
It's all fun and games until you rupture a testicle
How do u even exfoliate your vagina
You’re better off without him. Actually, he’s better off without you and that’s what really matters
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