i just posted a lake picture of you with a dead fish in your mouth. happy july 5th.
she is the kim kardashian of front butts
Writing apology letters and leaving them on peoples doors for your actions is NOT what I want to be doing at 6am.
Dude just read our convo. Apparently I was talking to you while I was naked. She wasn't happy about it.
Going to.goingto.gtoing to DIE DIE DIEEEE......i feel like everyeone impotrant in my life like MLK is judging me.... saddd day
He made me meet him in the baby department of walmart where he was waiting with his pregnant girlfriend. Time for a new dealer
I'm so hungover that if we go to panera, I'll probably get a bread bowl to throw up in.
She almost killed me. The shot she handed me had tacks in it. Wtf?!
Carpeing THE FUCK out of that diem
Judging by the progress I've made since I woke up (none) I'm thinking this hangover may keep me in bed.
I'm gonna chug this bud light an might injure this high school penis, like I'm 17 again
I just gotta say that I feel so much better now that I got some. I mean I feel like a normal functioning adult ready to contribute to society.
I just watched your sister pour half a bottle of cotton candy flavored snow cone syrup into a bottle of marshmallow flavored vodka, take a swig, frown, and pour a cherry coke in.
Just wait until she offers you a "powerita"
i do my most serious thinking while screwing her. ive pondered everything from quantum physics to the life cycle of a badger. if i keep this up ill have a phd in no time.
Last night was fun. Sorry I slipped out before you woke up
Also, your parents get up REALLY early. Please thank them for the bagel and travel mug of coffee. Happy Thanksgiving!
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