HELP! I am trapped in a douchebag ad... full of Affliction and Ed Hardy. Seriously? is he gonna leave his sunglasses on the entire 10 seconds of this encounter?
Since my computer broke, i've been masterbating to girls gone wild. I feel like i'm in the 90's.
Sacagawea was the original milf.
I just witnessed two drunk midgets fighting over a graham cracker. I can die happy now.
Yea. You cant just squeeze my balls. They are sensitive
they wouldn't let me take the pitcher of beer on the ferris wheel
How do you say "I'm sorry I beat you up while cumming" in German?
He drew a face on his balls with a sharpie. It was like giving head to a unicorn.
Fuck a-yeah! I just found a wine key. Let 'Don't Fuck With Me Friday' commence.
YOU COME FROM SAD WHALE FAMILY, DEEP IN OCEAN!
his brother walked in while we were fucking on the couch, told me i had "lovely jugs" and offered to make both of us a drink
Just followed a blind kid around for 20 minutes to see how awesome his guide dog was. And he was pretty fucking awesome
We made out and he didn't grope me. I liked it. I felt like I was innocent again.
I think I'm at a stage of my life where I subconsciously purposefully fuck everything up just to see if I can find a way out of it.
Omg I just woke up in his bed.. I'm fully clothed and he is naked. I'm so confused.
Randomize
