Saw a Delta Zeta recruitment poster today. On it, somebody added, "All you need is your daddy's credit card and a lack of self-respect."
you know what would be great? if dirt tasted like steak and could get you drunk.
just read twilight to her over the phone, while in the bathtub, candlelight...i'd love to say no homo but that was so gay.
my mom used to put diet coke in my bottle. i can pretty much handle anything.
went for icecream. accidentally deepthroated it. my mom gave me a dirty look, but the kid behind the counter looked impressed
we found you in the closet, clutching coats that werent yours for stability
Well I can cross being naked in a minivan off the list
Don't blame me. I told you I didn't know if I had a key to those hancuffs.
My night ended with a French cab driver offering me his sperm free of cost.
I walked into my house with my pants inside out, no shoes and a limp. My mom asked me if I had fun but I passed out before I could reply...
yesterday pre dick pic he said "no disrespect to your situation but i cant wait to get ahold of you again in the future" is this how people network??
Fuck I forgot the furry convention was this weekend and now I'm downtown. Way too high for this shit.
My RA just sigh me high as fuck acting like a zombie and scratching at my door. Thoughts?
You can't die you're my only democrat family member
Hey, you should go to your facebook ASAP... i'm guessing you're wasted but you just uploaded a picture of someones dick...and everyones taking bets now if its Rick or Mikes..
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