apparently it's okay for him to stick his dick in my mouth but not to let me have a can of diet pepsi for the road.
buying booze in bulk is always a bad idea. i wish there was some direct deposit-like system
Every time a song comes on I get sad if glee has not a cover of it
he puked in his toast at dennys. after snoopdogg high fived him. couldn't be prouder to be his bro in law.
I woke up with my left arm looking like it got mauled by a lion. Oo and she said someone broke her car window.
Just realized these events may be related.
I met her tumbling down the stairs chugging Captain Morgan. I'm not sure why she has the better reputation either.
DOWN HORMONES. BACK.
RA just said I set the all time record for a student who lost houseing..30min..I was moveing out while my new roomate was moveing in. know of any off campous places to stay??
I guess? According to Jeff his mom is wondering when the grand babies will arrive. So I don't think they like ME so much as my supposed functioning uterus
telling her she was ovary-acting wasn't the greatest idea. doing it in a text so she could see your spelling was where you really went wrong, though.
You should have seen the pharmacists face when I paid for my inhaler refill and a box of condoms.
We need to borrow someone's dog. Just so we can non-creepily go to PetSmart and watch all the other dogs take photos with Santa
Glitter fights sound a lot funner in theory.
The stripper started talking about murdering people....that lapdance turned dark.....
I need a pedicure
You need to go to planned parenthood
Randomize
