her nipple to breast ratio was just odd
I just had my first uncircumcised penis. I kept staring at it like the foreskin was going to fall off on its own.
god I hate her. why can't she just fuck and leave like a normal slut.
i woke up to my roomate hitting me in the head with a can of PBR at 8:30 in the morning...i love spring break
No that means he must've used the nipple clamps
Apparently we both projectiled on Erin at the same time.
That's some true roommate bonding right there.
It's not even like I care. He was cute 30lbs ago and before he fucked that Michael Jackson look alike.
Why is it so hot and why are these the only pants in my life.
If I win the lottery I'm going to hire someone to skywrite "FUCKTARD" over his house. That much anger.
Dude, I got drunk and sexted his little sister by accident
This is a question I thought I'd never have to ask. How many hits of acid did you give your dad tonight?
At least you didn't lose your virginity to chumbawumba
I woke up and finished the bottle like a champ
He stopped in the middle of us fucking so he could turn on lithuanian techno music. And the sad thing is that it was the best sex of my life.
Well when we Get drunk it gets rowdy. We could always attempt self-control. But historically and statistically speaking, we fail at that.
Randomize
