and apparently i was drunk enough to follow up with "I'd let me touch your boobs" ... not my best line.
Just woke up with my keys in one hand and cheesecake in the other.
making out was so insane. it felt like our tongues were paintbrushes made of waves and we were painting an ocean galazy
Between the hair pulling and the choking its its more like combat than sex
Sorry I have an "Operation Iraqi Freedom" fantasy
I don't know bro, all I could remember is that he kept saying hallelujah and calling that girl Slutimus Prime
Peeing off the roof of a motel lighting a cigar with matches and speaking fluent spanish with a chilen exchange student...how do iget into these situations?
We created a neighborhood watchdog drinking game
I almost got on a bus to Langley Air Force Base. 99% sure that's not where I wanna be.
I'm playing a lilo and stitch drinking game
Aloha alcoholism.
I have bruises from doing the splits on the poles, if that doesn't scream bourbon street regret then I don't know what does
I'm sorry I keep having sex wth your friends. I'm done, for real. Unless cole is interested. Other than that, I'm done.
I need to stop agreeing to hang out with people when I'm drunk.
It's like jay gatsby himself preordained that our genitals meet again.
I HAVE DISCOVERED LONDON AND IT FILLS ME WITH JOY
Well, he was practically tripping over his dick to get to me so I'd say my new dress was successful
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