That should be a holiday. like easter. but bulges instead of baskets
I will never underestimate my ability to drunken ramble. At one point last night i think i was talking about hieroglyphics
Like if Robert Downey Jr. and Kiefer Sutherland got together for a bender, that's how drunk I want us to be.
can you come back were all locked out and alyssia's still inside passed out on the floor but more importantly i left a beer in there that's not finished
I'm not asking you to commit. I'm politely asking your penis to be my friend.
The less fucks you give, the more fucks you get. Kinda like "a penny saved is a penny earned" but with vagina.
Three Architectural classes: $990.00 Architectural supplies: $300.00 Changing majors and using my architectural supplies to roll blunts: Priceless
If he survived pride he can survive a gay bar
I accidentally kneed him in the balls while trying to straddle him so we ended up spending the night watching ffm porn online
I slept naked with a towel wrapped around my waist in case I pissed the bed again
I am going to paint butt plugs like little Christmas trees and give them as gifts.
You could paint cock rings as wreaths.
Im showing up stoned and in sweatpants. Because that is where im at in life right now. Sorry not sorry.
does anyone know where bryan is?
last i saw he was naked, and crying in the bathroom because there was no more booze.
I'm just too horny to handle empty house
People probably think I’m a fangirl bc I go to so many shows but it’s really bc I like fucking the tour manager
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