Is it weird that I think of Ennis from Brokeback Mountain everytime I hear "Make em Say" by Master P? "I don't need your money. Huh." NA NA NA NAAA.
There's a girl n class drinking wine out of a taco bell cup. I can smell it.. it's totally reisling. JEALOUS.
just puked in a purse in the store. some girl asked if i was gonna buy it now and i laughed and asked her why id want a bag some dude just puked in. her face looked like she saw the devil.
"Whiskey Cheerios" was a terribly great idea.
some drunk guy just paid $3 for each cig that i picked up off the ground. the cigs that he threw on the ground. I might just follow him the rest of the night
they have a video of him in his boxers making a snow angel in the hallway is his own vomit and coca cola.
If those antibiotics mean you can't drink, ya might as well pack your bags and re-enroll next fall, because sobriety this week would be social suicide.
College: when you wake up drunk without pants and wearing a Cosby sweater
I feel like one thing if I have going for me is that my bed looks like a nice place to have sex
I ate breakfast with him. And by ate breakfast I mean we fucked on the kitchen table.
I decided taking Molly and seeing Birdman seemed like a wise life choice.
You tried to ride his dick and fell off. Then tried to ride the floor. That's why he hasn't called back
The only people allowed to make me cry are myself and Chris Hemsworth as Thor. And me.
I found out he hated a girl that I hate so I fucked him. My reasons for fucking guys are getting bad.
Perfect attendance and not being drunk since Sunday. This is a new leaf if I've ever seen one
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