she woke up with a sticky ear
Just saw ur first draft of ur suicide note.
You spelled "worthless" wrong.
Awesome, the library of congress archived all tweets. Now my great great grandchildren can pinpoint the date they inherited alcoholism.
Hmd? did you really just created an abbrievation for hold my dick?
I've slipped into the part of my life where I am not having sex to get Phils tickets from this chick. I need to seriously rethink my life decisions
Dont care what i do tnt just as long as i get to chug a beer in somebodys face
She clicked her fingers, said "here boy!", and pointed at her vagina.
WHO THE FUCK TAGS THEMSELVES AT COUNTY JAIL?!?!
We used a snorkel as a funnel. Can you say desperate?
So after I fell off 4 times we concluded I'm not allowed to ride him anymore.
FUCK IM ABOUT TO GET A DICK PIC IN THE LIBRARY
I managed all three standard threesome configurations a female-bodied person can achieve in just under nine years. I want to high-five everyone involved, but I've lost touch with a couple of them
if you were broke and planning on using koolaid as a tequila chaser which flavor would you pick?
How do I tell this guy that if he does not like the condoms at my apartment, he should bring his own without sounding like a sure thing?
Say it's BYOC night at the beach. And, you are a sure thing. Own it.
If you can endure a laser on the butthole, you can endure a wax on the butthole. Those are words to live by.
Randomize
