I'd rather watch my mom take a shit while reading the sunday new york times than watch mama mia .
there was a trapeze. enough said
I kept calling his name while we were having sex cuz i was so proud that i remembered it.
I was so high i started crying when i saw how much puppychow was there.
I made a mac n' cheesicle. Better in my head than in real life. Gonna keep smoking to see if it gets better.
Solid teamwork gives us a good shout of both bringing home trophy cougs
There are 18k people at the game and I'm next to the one guy who pulls his underwear down to his ankles to piss.
Every single item that was in my fridge is now in my hot tub. Please help
Such a good question, let's ask the alcohol gods for the answer.
Remember when we partied so hard that dude died and it cockblocked you hooking up with my sister?
I forgot that happened. That's the second dude that died on a vacation I've been on
I think I just gave my niece a weed pinata...
Lol I wish they went straight to your cock then shot out into my mouth like a cock nacho dispenser
He literally knows my vagina better then I do.
I'm giving drunk me full control of my body for the next few days. Please don't let me die.
Ps can u get with my cousin? He's a freshman at uconn and he's very attractive but like were related....
Randomize
