I gave her the chance to be interesting and she failed. So then I gave her a chance to be slutty and she failed at that too.
Dude, I just saw a sixteen year old girl in a catholic school uniform buying a pregnancy test... With a coupon!
you'd be alarmed at how much plan b i just found in mom's bathroom...
Well if my looks don't work with her I'll eat the 50 nuggets to impress her fat roommate.
You're getting a blowjob this afternoon. This has been your morning public service announcement.
You turned byob into bring your own shit show. Good work.
He will. He has no choice. What's he gonna do? Find a better fuck buddy? We both know that's not possible. I'm the ideal friend with benefit. Minus snoring and uneven tits.
I think I'm gonna wear a bikini to our final tomorrow...just so he knows that no fucks will be given on his test
Also I had a dream we made my birth control into a joint. What does that mean?
I like to feed my guinea pigs before I get stoned. In case they get contact high and get the munchies. It's only polite.
he was making out with her against the stove and started a fire--the thirst literally almost burned the place down!!
I'm to the point where I just want to get back at him in a hot man sex tornado way.
The tequila monkeys have a drum solo in my skull right now. I can't imagine Emily feels better.
i think it’s okay to see him. you just can’t wind up with his penis in your mouth again
This is the fourth guy that I've broken in to gay sex. How the hell do they find me?
Positive reviews on angieslist?
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