Kroger has a sale on economy packs of some ridic brand of condom with a smiley devil heart on it $4.99 for 24
Sounds like a baby waitign to happen
party is dying down. we just wrote whore in the yard with gas. Photos to come.
My cousins just decided to make a catapult to spread my Grandpa's cremated remains. I love my family.
I hope the prosecutor is a dude cause my lawyer is hot.
My Grampa even called her out for being a cock block at the bar...it was that serious
This morning two of his housemate threw confetti over me, started singing and handed me a make shift trophy out of cereal boxes and beer cans that said 'Harry's Virginity' on it. Fucking brilliant!
Don't worry that pussy is fresh, I'd brush my teeth with it.
He has an intense fear that my cat will attack his balls while we're fucking
Jesus just hopped over the fence with a rack of coors. How's your Halloween?
I promise it'll work. Just go there and keep the lights off and keep saying blaowww. She'll think your me.
I haven't seen her in ages, how is she?
Well I woke up next to her this morning so I guess I would say she could be doing better
We're all getting matching jack daniels tattoos. We're gonna be an alcoholic gang of awesome.
omg so there's this guy on the roof and he just stripped for no reason and now i think he's making out on the rooftop with some other guy? who are these people
He fucked me for my Netflix login, I fucked him for his HBO login, and actually I think that's beautiful
I just did my taxes to sober up, I'm THAT hungover
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