k, so I just picked a four leaf clover, then saw my dads penis. Lucky? I think not.
I wish everyone could be as happy as the people in the laxative commercials.
Smoked a bowl on a rollercoaster. Literally ON. Beat that.
he wanted me to put the condom on for him. I was high and couldn't figure it out.. so instead we played xbox.
you can feel better about your life now. i slept with a guy who has gold teeth
I've got 2 dollars. How do I turn this into alcohol?
Sounds like sex on a twister board.
An idea that is both hilarious and intriguing...
It feels like you stuck your dick in a fire and then branded the inside of me.
It's okay. I've dumbed down my notes over the semester because I knew I wouldn't be up to understanding things come finals.
Ok let me just clear up this blowjob thing first so we can talk about your grandpa
There are many penises to be discovered and claimed tonight
We're like Lewis and Clark
I was driving around a golf cart with a keg in the back before I got caught by the cops. First slow speed chase ever
Just wiped the ashes off my forehead before he came over to have sex. Definitely going to hell.
Who else will cuddle and watch the Bachelor with me then finger bang me during the rose ceremony
There is no rule that you can't be in a room with more than one dick that's been inside you.
Randomize
