chris hansen is no longer pursuing child predators.let's celebrate
i'll bring the hard lemonade and lube
Ill do this for you.
You are a team player.
This is me making up for not putting my tongue inside you more.
you didnt know i had herpes?
PS, you're not being slutty, you're "making dreams true."
DIN'T JUSGE NE.
There are too many people and smells in this elevator for my hangover to handle.
Ive only seen a dude masterbate on a train twice, once on the Jtrain and once on the Ftrain... trust me you never wanna see where the subway turns around.
Just got a blowie during the Avengers. It's weird knowing that the high point of your life just happened.
We are buying drugs from a guy with a Jesus fish on his dodge caravan.
I'm really sorry that I blew your friend in your bed, but to be fair he started it.
Hey, I took a sweater from your house. And, um, your little brother's virginity.
A gay guy went down on me in the club bathroom and then fixed my makeup for me
its gonna be a great night
Baked goods and tits. Hard to go wrong there.
I'm a little concerned about right now. You showed up at my house soaking wet, drunk with a bag of ham and 2 liter of Dr. Pepper, and you refused to tell me where you got the ham until I gave you some more liquor.
where are you?
two trains and a bus walk of shame. so not worth it.
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