Cops are here now. U need to come back. Ur not under arrest. But u need to apologize to the woman for what you did to her cat.
You act like I'm friends with her or something. I only screw her boyfriend!
Oh yeah.
it was like weight watchers had a halloween party.
Those motion detector trash cans don't work fast enough to catch puke.
if she didnt wantt to be febrezed, she shouldnt have smelled so desperate.
Your cock deserves a montage
I just spent 5 minutes saying how beautiful you are and you come back with dont get fat cause you have weird nipples.
I have this vague feeling that I was involved in a dance off with a homeless man?
Do u ever find yourself high af, watching American ninja warrior and crying at the athletes stories?
I think I just got buffalo sauce on my penis. Is that a turn on or off?
We aren't doing Shrooms tonight bc that would be friendship cheating on you
I wear drunk well.
Ah you cut my boxers off with scissors, we're way past introductions
First time not coming to this class high in a month and a half, never again will i put myself thru this torture
I swear to god, if you ever yell my name during sex with my sister again..your balls will be stapled to your nipples.
Randomize
