So im pretty sure the object of my emotional onterest is tired of playing with me....
Baby momma caught me doing baby daddy in reverse cowgirl. She kicked me out and i have no clothes, come get me.
I hope you walked the shit out of that shame.
im sitting at a bagel shop wearing a princess crown hungover and have a sweater that is not mine.
Disadvantage of being gay..... my gag reflexes makes trying to make myself throw up extremely difficult.
Lady GaGa only went backwards in convincing me she's not a man at the VMAs.
I don't know. The next thing I remember we were in the walmart parking lot making out.
At what number of girls whose last names are stored in your phone book as drinking establishments does it become excessive?
I wonder sometimes what your vagina thinks about you.
He is going overseas for 8 months, not only was that blowjob a going away present, but i was supporting the troops
He somehow managed to bang-mail me last night. I woke up this morning to a voicemail from 1:54 a.m. of moaning and screaming. I now know how talented he is and how annoying I am to have sex with.
Sorry about the voicemail last night, people in hostel thought getting the clap from cheating on me wasn't enough and you hearing a 6 foot 5 Swedish dude bang the shit out of me was needed.
he told me he could still feel the blowjob i gave him last year
wow. THAT good huh
Just wanted to say, I appreciate your bravery in having read receipts
why did you put a dildo on the ceiling fan
the dildo had a suction cup and we had a ceiling fan what did you expect?
He's got that kind of dick that just MAKES me cheat on my boyfriend. It deserves a trophy. Really you should give it ride sometime.
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