I'll bet she douches with gravy.
I have two girls sleeping in my bed naked and I ended up making it to class, what were you saying about staying in on the weekdays?
I made a vision board specifically for the purpose of boning john mayer.
Hes warming up week old McDonalds french fries, putting hot sauce on them, and counting them with his shirt off.
He had a ladies night special at his place. Unlimited jello shots till 10, 50 cents after.
I tried giving you a bj last night and all you could manage was "Haha that tickles" and "in the morning"
This juggling 3 dicks is getting exhausting
I feel like you just railed me after that sext
Well be careful man. Be careful. Wear shoes in the house. Safety. Safety first, then teamwork.
It's not that I'm in love with her, so much as I would love to be her lesbian experience.
School starts Thursday. Don't fling yourself out of the car to throw up screaming "classy" before I park this time.
It's a new year.
Looking for my adderal, only found acid. What a shame
Okay, this next statement may sound like a red flag but I'm tellin you, shotgunning those two beers really helped me love my child more effectively. Honest.
You know what...ii have the turtles...were together....i love these god damn turtles...
I thought I was at a rave until the paramedics started chasing me. You win again tequila.
Randomize
