He's been sleeping iwht ***
Nooo
Yeah I don't even know how, she looks like her mom smoked crack while she was in the womb
And then hit her in the face with a shovel
we have pet lesbian snakes
my little brother just caught me blowing my step cousin in the lobby bathroom at our family reunion
Brandon just fucked that chick! I tried to warn him but T9 said she had "puppy roses" instead of "pussy sores"
is it true you fucked a yoga instructor last night??! ..and let me know if you want me to post that question on your facebook so kelly can see how happy you are without her
I fucking love fucking science majors-- she told me that she wanted to know if her gag reflex got better or worse with alcohol, and that her initial evidence had been inconclusive. So, next few weeks, yeah, gettin blown periodically. All I have to do is keep a log.
Your last words were "i'm gonna motorboat the bartender." then you commenced with an attempted motorboat
i remember too much of last night for it to have been successful
I just pull a splinter from the head of my penis. It was a rough night.
So someone just pointed out to me that during dinner, I mentioned more women that I'm attracted to than men. The transition might be complete. I'm gay.
he fell asleep like an hour after we got to the beach, he deserved that penis shaped sunburn.
Walked into a bathroom stall to pop an addy for my three back-to-back finals today. Felt like Clark Kent walking into a phonebooth.
Dude, you stalking his LINKEDIN profile will NOT affect your chances with him. We aren't 40...
I realize my mistake but don't you dare school me in cock, young man
My sensibilities as a lady demand we cuddle on the couch, and THEN have loud, raunchy sex. Idk, what do you want to do?
Randomize
