The lack of respect you have for your penis baffles me. I'd rather rub my ball sack on public toilet seats than stick my dick in some of those girls.
A simple 'no' would have sufficed
My wife googled 'purchase vibrator.' Not sure if I should be excited or offended.
He is the Donovan McNabb of stuff up his ass. Tell me that tomorrow. Too high to remember.
I can'nr wwn explain this nihght . So amnt dixks. Shitttttt.
He thought I was flirting with him but really I just needed someone to hold me up.
stop calling me dude. finger blasting me officially kills you being able to call me dude.
$200 on plane. $110 on train. $5 per drink on plane. $15 per case on train. Plane 1 hour flight. Train 9 hour excursion. Hmmmmm.
Well I never thought in the future I'd be able to say "hey remember that Easter I made porn?"
What was the point of renting a $600 trolley if no one even remembers going to the first bar?
I gave the bike taxi guy a blowjob because I didn't have any cash. College.
Talking to a customer about getting high and staring at glow in the dark wheels while there is a cop in the store. Just another day in Tampa
I haven't answered because I haven't figured out a polite way of saying fuck no
Some Romanian guy at work just told me "you come my house, we drink beer and you come make fuck with my sister"
If he's not there watching you go for it. It's been a while bro.
I've realized that drinking at your apartment alone on a Tuesday probably isn't a good thing.
Cops swarmed my car last night in the walmart parking lot cause of the paper plate
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