Thong +tight pants =hungry butt. Not a good look on big women! Walmart sucks.
He jizzed my face. I had to ask for a washcloth. He ran his underwear under the water and handed them to me. Not so romantic.
i'm wearing my white shorts to coax my period out of hiding.
We decided we needed a drinks fridge in our bathroom.
She's all pretty and bubbly and nice and I'm sitting here stoned looking like Lucifer.
All I remember is this kid kept saying that he has a dream that white kids and black kids can take shots together as one, and just we'd keep drinking to that.
Dude next time u fuck on our counters will u please let me know BEFORE I make lunch.
I'm super stoned watching the vatican smoke cam. Come over.
I've had to do a couple req orders today and I would like to submit to you an order form to requisition DAT ASS
Tbh I fell asleep cuddling a bag of Brazilian nuts. Franzia never dissappoints me
I think he should just go away to a small penis island and never come back
Fire trucks are here again. It wasn't me this time.
They sent him a photo of me smoking a bong whilst wearing the dinosaur head. I think that's the last we hear of his nonsmoking fitness freak ass 🤷🏼♀️
Finally finished unpacking shit from school n found a bra with no idea whose it is... I miss college so much it hurts sometimes
Very interesting. Let's just say I got home last night and threw up, found a joint in my bra, and woke up naked in my bed
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