erin looks like she hung out with the sham wow guy last night. she's got the beat up hooker look goin' on
What kind of soap washes out shame, bad decisions, and whiskey?
Irish Spring?
this guy at work is bossing me around at work. He is 24 and still has highlights and spikes his hair.
You're getting bossed around by a 1999 Highschool Yearbook picture?
this is amzing! feels like my body is having sex with its surroundings!
just walked into the room and her sister said loudly, "do him, or I will."
had a convo with my professor before class while peeing... new level of awkward or a breakthrough in our relationship? i feel like there is no longer a professional boundary.
He cheated on me in real life. I can cheat at words with friends.
I just pulled a piece of cookie out of my bra in the middle of class. I'm forever alone.
you are never too drunk for berry picking
Drank for free all night and I'm not even sleeping w the bartender. What is this magic?
Officially crunch time. It's my last year of grad school and I've yet to get blown in a school library. The parking garage was less than a block away though.
Actually just remembered that solo cup full of scotch that random guy gave me for not farting on him. That's probably why
I feel like my vagina was just in a fistfight.
I need to hurry up and get over my feelings for him so next year's tipsy reunion sex won't be clouded by emotions.
my downstairs neighbor came by to say he’s having a huge loud party tomorrow, handed me a toblerone bar, and said thank you in advance for your understanding
Randomize