the kid next to me in training is drinking sangria. its 9am here in case you couldnt calculate. its going to be a good year.
i have rugburns grass stains and some road rash. im an all terrain slut
Make sure to show her the sewer we were arrested in on your tour.
Swallowing. Like you said. Lions. Always.
I like to keep a steady black out going for the holidays. I feel it makes me less cynical
I'm afraid you are becoming too bourgeois with your switch from boxed wine to bottled.
I'm sitting in my room naked waiting for him. When he gets here im going to make him do 20 pushups and lick my clit for a hour
We need to drink more. Just think how awesome it would be to wake up in a trailer and NOT remember how wee got here.
Dude come to her party. Someone just took a body shot of rubbing alcohol
Like I could never be a lawyer because I would just look like a porn star impersonation of a lawyer.
He paid for a 5 star hotel suite and I raided the mini bar after he left. I think that’s bad karma. Want some pringles?
Our sex is like an episode of "The Simpsons." Picture Homer choking Bart, and that's pretty much what we're into.
Your boobs are like a folk legend.
(919) the date's not going well. He's on his phone talking about his eBay amine shit...
the weird part wasn't waking up in someone else's underwear, it was how the cat was staring at me like he knew more about last night then i remembered.
Randomize