so my mom just told me that she wouldnt pick me up and take us to taco bell at 3AM...
I told you I would drunk text you sometime........its that time.
He just screamed at her, "if you pass out i am still having sex with you!!!" In front of the entire party.
I take no responsibility of who alcohol hooks up with using my body!
currently walking past a fire hyrdrant with a hose already attatched.. this could be dangerous..
Dude. I tried to convince her to eat poprocks and give me a blowjob. It did not work out well.
It's a good thing i didn't end up pregnant...i would have had to figure out his last name.
We were walking home when he passed out, we left him. Just got a call from him, hes in a jail in Canada.
whatever buzz i had immediately ended when i saw her run through a sliding glass door
my taxi driver is listening to 50 shades of grey audiobook. this is uncomfortable.
Join us. We're on the roof drinking breakfast
I'm so glad you support me having casual sex with your uncle
I just watched some kid bang his girlfriend and I was like whatever I'll just sit here and do all your fucking drugs that's fine
Well... Chad blew off half of his hand last night. We were able to find most of it.
Just letting you know that while you peed your pants in that guys jeep, The orgasm I had made my hair fall out... Good morning.
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