Dude ! Why is there vomit with whole pieces of sushi in the shower when the toilet is not more than 2 feet away ? btw you need to chew your food better,
oral is when you put your mouth on someones privates and play moterboat or popsicle
I woke up in what appears to be a taco bell graveyard in my bed.
We made the pizza boy do Jell-o shots with us. He didn't even deliver to our house, we just called him over from the neighbors
I just horrified a large group of people. Congrats on dating me.
I'm drinking wine alone, eating leftovers, and cleaning my sex toys. For the love of god, do not graduate.
It took too long for people to come up with things in "never have i ever" so we had to change it to "Don't judge me but.."
I made him an O's fan. One pic of my tits coming out of a Baltimore shirt and it was done.
I just took what could be the most awkward shit in my life, which considering my definition of awkward and my experiences shitting, is pretty fucking awkward.
...
I was sitting there doing my business and the guy in the stall next to me banged on the stall and asked me how to spell picnic because he wasn't sure.
I found us a new booze connection and I'm writing college admissions essays. The future is bright.
I told him we could use my stove to make weed brownies, from that point on he kept reffering to me as "best pledge ever"
Um so I might have accidentally on accident maybe blew up the bottom half of your truck...
The neighbors in the apartment above us are at it again. The roleplay this time is cop and prostitute. I give it 30 minutes, you? Already sounds better than the last one
I just peed on myself the semester has officially began.
but next to his bed he has a bible, and on the bible he has a pbr coaster and a condom. how can i stay mad at that? Its amazing.
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