So drunk its hurt
id be glad to
No, I'm talking to this Chinese girl. Can't understand a word she's saying, but i think i caught the word vagina a few times.
I'm not conventionally pretty...I'm just crazy
I just spent $27 on things to pee on.
just got drunk at a party with Christmas themed solo cups.. holidays are officially here.
These guys are walking up and down the hallway yelling, "Yo, is this the floor with the unisex bathroom?"
My professor just gave everyone in the class extra credit... except for the kid wearing the Cubs hat
12 garbage cans filled with water, a beer can floating in every garbage can, 20 ft. apart and you shoot with dodge balls..and thats only how the night began
Do you think I should make him wait for my responses or do you think sophomore have no concept of time like dogs?
and then the entire party sang the national anthem a capella around the keg.
his life revolves around getting high and answering people on yahoo answers. he's perfect for you.
Poorly worded request for dick pic resulted in stoned beanie selfies and "lol". Miscommunication is the devil's cock block.
No he's here. We were watching Harry Potter stoned as shit and he fell asleep with his head in my lap. I'll figure out what to do with him after Harry gives Dobby the sock.
He told me I had smoking hot areolas then he wins an executive of the year award. How does that even happen?
Randomize
